A Look at Love

I have heard it said several times in my life girls say, "I love him; I'm just not in love with him." I can completely understand this saying. I love my husband, and I am completely, totally in love with him! But I also disagree with this statement in how it is used: as a reason to end a marriage. So many people get divorced because they don't feel "in love" with their spouse. It is really sad to me! And society completely condones this ideal of love. It's every where we look! I was watching an E! True Hollywood Story on J. Lo the other day. So many people look up to her. I lost count of how many times she got married. She ended her marraiges whenever she fell out of love for each of them.

So most people are getting divorced because they aren't in love any more. I believe very strongly that this idea of love is completely wrong. This "in love" feeling that everyone talks about is just that: a feeling. Feelings come and go. Feelings are based a lot on emotions. I am constantly reminded of something my best friend Kristen and I have often reminded each other with: Emotions do not reflect reality. The emotions and feelings of being "in love" do not reflect the reality of love.

What is love? The Bible gives us a clear answer: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, iit is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil. But rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails.

The truth and reality of love is that it is an action towards other people. It is a choice we make every moment of every day. This truth is the reason that I believe anyone can work out the problems in their marriage and relationships. Love is being completely unselfish and choising to act rightly towards the person/people we love.

Now for a few quotes:
"'True Love' isn't so much a dreamy feeling that you have as it is an enduring commitment to give sacrificially - even, or perhaps especially, when you don't feel like it." (William R. Mattox, Jr.)
I like this quote because it shows that love is a choice we make even when we don't want to or don't feel like it. It's a choice we make in how to treat our spouse even when we do not think they deserve to be treated with love. That is true love! That is love that will endure and the love the holds a marriage together for years and years to come.

"I believe love is primarily a choice and only sometimes a feeling. If you want to feel love, choose to love and be patient." (Real live Preacher, Dec. 16, 2002, RealLivePreacher.com Weblog)
I really like this quote because it just supports when I have been saying about love. It also shows that it you want to feel "in love," you need to act, to choose to love. This idea plays a very big part in my marriage. I love to feel "in love" and to feel happy in my marriage and feel Keith's love for me. In order to keep this feeling, we know that we have to do things to keep that feeling, the passion and romance, alive. This idea is the reason we make a point to do things such as going on dates together and spending time deepening our friendship with each other. We know a good marriage takes work.

It really saddens me to see so many people hurting and getting divorced because they have a wrong view of love. There is so much more I could talk about with this issue, but for now I will end it here.

So, go out and truly love people today!